Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Is there anything you did that you regret? If so, what is it, and why?

I see through liars

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Which feels physically better for guys: vaginal sex or anal sex?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What is the sum of X+XX+XXX+XXXX?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I can read

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What is every dictators biggest fear?

I actually pay taxes

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

How can you maintain self-control?

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Stock futures drop on rising geopolitical risk as Israel-Iran attacks continue: Live updates - CNBC

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

How do I develop the patience to read books?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

What is the most ridiculous obviously false verse in the Bible?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Why is Jack Smith arguing that presidents should not have full immunities as Trump is requesting?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have complete contempt for fakery

Why do some children hate their parents?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Atheists who said that reading the Bible made them an atheist, how? Literally there are millions of people who read the Bible daily and still believe in God. So why say that? I mean unless you want to sound smart & edgy

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What advice would you give to a father of a teenage daughter on how to protect her from boys, dating, and social media? How should fathers discuss these topics with their daughters?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Isn't it a turn on to have sex with a girl in a skirt or in a tight spandex?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Is 1500 calories enough for a 5’3 15-year-old who is non-active?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand how hurricane paths work

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I can count

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee